Scales of Independent Behavior-Revised....

I feel like all I do is whine. It still needs to get out and so here goes another post.

Evaluations of your disabled child are so much fun. They are an emotional roller coaster at best and a serious psyche scrambling event that can cause serious self doubt among other side effects.

In the beginning...I thought that evaluations were a little more simplified and could pinpoint exact issues and magically spit out a laundry list of remedies for said issues. Ah....I was so young and believing. Those were the days. Funny that's consistent with my childhood belief that the only injuries that existed were broken legs, broken arms and sprained ankles.

It only took a few more IEPs to slowly dissolve both my hopes and my resolve. I think that it was sped up just a leeeetle bit because I had double the number of Tris and annuals.


Evals are very helpful because they CAN give you a better picture of what is exactly going on with your kiddo. The patterns of strengths and weaknesses start to emerge. At the same time you have to switch gears because your original plan of FIXING EVERYTHING AND MOVING ON is starting to lose its punch and you feel your knees start to buckle.

The next step for living with the evaluations turns into a battle between hope, a sense of progress and reality. Add to the mix the need to feel some sense of normality. To feel like your kid was still your kid and not an aggregate of scores and abilities. I love my kid....I am ok with autism.....it doesn't matter what is going on. It lasts until another IEP and the need to evaluate again.

Tri-annual evaluations are even worse because there are usually packets that need to be filled out by the parent. Question after question in different categories of behavior where you select the degree of ability up until you have to start checking the "NEVER" box for every question because everything they are asking is way beyond your guy's ability.

Smacking you in the face again with the differences between your boy and the typical kids his age.
1. Holds out arms and legs while being dressed
2. Puts on pants and underpants.
skip to question 10
10. Selects and puts on a complete set of clothing that is appropriate to wear around the home.
11. Turns clothing right side out for dressing.
12. selects the right clothing for different weather conditions.
16. Repairs minor damage to clothing, such as tears or mission buttons, or arranges for these repairs outside the home.


Even worse is the section on time and punctuality.
1. Uses the words "morning" and "night" correctly. And it just gets worse from there.

First question...right off the bat....one whole page of "NEVER"s.
Blech.

Home and community orientation
1. Stays in an unfenced yard for 10 minutes without wandering away.

I wish.

Drives me nuts just writing about it. It's the comparison game and it is crazy annoying.  I love my boys the way they are....I am at peace with autism.....we are in a happy place now. But having to evaluate my kid's ability to tell time and everything else he can't do just reminds me of the road ahead of us. The long waiting road. Maybe more than anything the evals make me feel out of control. It don't know. It just bugs.

On the bright side...and I only just realized this. This is Tyler's LAST tri-annual . Holy Cow. We started this craziness 15 years ago. Five Tri-annuals. Take THAT you stupid evaluations!!
He will NEVER be independent but that doesn't mean that I didn't do my job. I, on the other hand, know just how to make him happy. I already know that Ty is awesome...he is sweet and gets worried  with loud noises and he needs a lot of love and lots of pop tarts. He LOVES swimming, watching water circulate in the aquarium, spaghetti, etc. We are working on his acne and every couple of weeks he needs a good shave.

Wow. I'm really glad I wrote this post.